Saturday, November 29, 2008

Peggy Ann 1944-2008

Peggy was admitted to the hospital on Tuesday Nov 18 for dehydration. She had had diarrhea for several days and was very sick.

On Friday morning (nov 21), they moved her to the ICU as they were unable to keep her BP and blood sugar stable. I spoke to a nurse who told me that she was moved because in ICU they could give her medications that they couldn't on a normal floor because she would be constantly monitored in ICU. I called back later that afternoon and was told that her BP was getting more stabilized but that she was a very sick woman. I asked if she was so sick that we should be there. The nurse said it was up to us..and that she would come if it was her..but if it was going to be a problem with work that we could probably wait. At that point Kyle and I thought we would wait until the next morning and then go down. This was at 3:30 or 4ish.

At 4:30 Kyle's aunt Sally called. She was there at the hospital. She said she had just talked to the dr. and he said Peggy was toxic and would not make it through the night. that all of her organs were shutting down. She had to repeat the info to me 3 times. I could NOT wrap my head around the fact that she was saying peggy was going to die. I immediately called Kyle and told him we had to go to TN right then. He said he would be home as soon as he could. I started packing.

At 5:00 Kyle got home and made a few phone his dad and his siblings as they still had no idea what the dr. had told his aunt. He then called Sally again...and ended up talking to one of his uncles. While he was on the phone, the nurse came and got the family because Peggy was fading fast. Kyle stood in the kids bedroom and sobbed.We hugged and cried together. Then he got his tools and started fixing something on the backdoor so it could be locked easier since my mom would be taking care of the animals. Certainly not something that HAD to be done. But I assume it was something he could control at that point so that's what he did. I continued to get our things together.

At 6:00 Kyles uncle called and told him Peggy was gone. He leaned over and rested his head on the kitchen counter and bawled. Big tears fell from his face and pooled on the kitchen floor. I stood behind him and rubbed his back. When he stood up, we hugged and cried and the kids did too. Logan ran to his bedroom and I took Dylan to the couch where I could hold him better. Kyle finished fixing the door. I found Logan in his room rocking and crying and praying. Then he ran around the house crying and punching his fist saying he was SO MAD.

It was so heartbreaking. Kyle and I managed to settle down enough to talk to the boys and get them settled down. We then loaded the car and left. At this point the kids were much better and back to their laughing and fighting selves.

The next few days were a whirlwind of activity and decisions. Peggy had pre-arranged her funeral as far as the casket and the funeral home..and paid for it. So that part was taken care of. but we had no idea where to bury her, etc. The services were Tuesday and I swear it felt like it had been 2 weeks since the day she died when it finally arrived.

It ended up being a very lovely service and I think she would have been very pleased. It opened with a favorite song of hers (Most of All by the McGruders), then Kyles cousin's husband, Jay did an opening prayer, read the obituary and read a scripture she wanted read (Psalms 118:5). He also said some very nice things about her. Then, the congregation sang "Amazing Grace". Then the eulogy was given. Then Rick, Angela's husband (kyles sister) read a poem he wrote about a "Godly Mother", then there was a slide show with pics of Peggy through her life, then Lee's (Kyle brother) wife read a poem titled "The Best". One more song Peggy loved--I can't remember the name of it, but it was sung by Wendy Bagwell. Then the services were over and we headed to the cemetery.

The graveside service was nice--short and sweet as they usually are and then it was over. We each took a few flowers from the casket arrangement and then headed back to the house.

The house was a flurry of activity with all the family coming there. Thank God the church had brought food--I couldn't believe how fast everything was eaten. As it turned out none of us "kids" got a chance to eat and had to make a Sonic run later that night.

Life goes on...

As I finish writing this, tomorrow will be 2 weeks since she died. Amazing. I was getting dressed last night and was thinking about the kids pictures with Santa and thought, "I should send one to Peggy" then I remembered. I wonder if thoughts like that ever stop?

Kyle is doing well, as are the kids. They are sad, but we can talk about her and laugh about good things and memories. I think they'll be ok.


Robin said...

i'm so sorry for kyle's (and your's) loss. it's very hard to lose a parent, i know.